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Step: 5 Wise Counselor

Jesus answered, โ€œEveryone who drinks this water will be thirsty again, 14 but whoever drinks the water I give them will never thirst. Indeed, the water I give them will become in them a spring of water welling up to eternal life.โ€ John 4:13-14

The day I sat on the edge of my bed whining to God about my miserable life โ€“ the lack of peace and joy โ€“ He spoke quite clearly to me.  โ€œWhat have you really done (to be close to me?),โ€ He said.  I got down on my knees and wept.  I prayed for Him to show me the steps to take to draw nearer to Him.  The next day He tasked me to go to the bookstore and get a devotional.  So, I stood in front of the hundreds of books and prayed, โ€œShow me.โ€

The book the Holy Spirit placed in my hands that day was called, โ€œPower Thoughtsโ€ by Joyce Meyer.  I try my best not to question God.  He knew exactly where my problem lay โ€“ my mind.

โ€œI am content and emotionally stable.โ€

โ€œI purse peace with God, myself and others.โ€

โ€œI live in the present and enjoy each moment.โ€

โ€œI am disciplined and self-controlled.โ€

โ€œI put God first in my life.โ€

These are just a few of the โ€œpower thoughtsโ€ I read over the course of the devotional that year.  My God-centered counseling session began each morning to help me battle the overwhelmingly negative thoughts I had so solidly built.  My stronghold was not fear of man, in fact my propensity was to be ready to fight each day I left my house.  My stronghold was not fear of serving in His name.  I did that willingly and often.  My stronghold, my addiction you might say, was self-hatred and self-doubt.  My husband once called me the โ€œQueen of the Woulda, Coulda, Shoulda.โ€

Iโ€™ve frequently been told I donโ€™t come off that way.  But Iโ€™ve come to realize there’s a difference between what a truly confident woman in Christ looks like and one that blusters her way through life.

Allowing Jesus and the Holy Word to become my wise counselor isnโ€™t easy.  Itโ€™s painful sitting in โ€œthe chairโ€ having someone show you your weaknesses.  And I have many.  But the beauty of our Lordโ€™s Word contains something that no one else can provide โ€“ a deep and lasting love behind every nudge, every reveal, every chastisement.

Thatโ€™s not to say human counselors donโ€™t have a place in our lives.  God uses many ways and messengers to guide us toward righteousness. A poll released in May 2004 found that an estimated 59 million people had received mental health treatment in the two years prior, and that 80 percent of them found it effective. But for the Christian we should seek guidance that has our faith in mind.  What is the point of a, say, marriage counselor who does not view or support marriage from Godโ€™s point of view?  When we seek out counseling for our weaknesses, past hurts, we should be reminded of Godโ€™s overwhelming love and forgiveness.  

This is why I love the counseling session at the well.

15 The woman said to him, โ€œSir, give me this water so that I wonโ€™t get thirsty and have to keep coming here to draw water.โ€

16 He told her, โ€œGo, call your husband and come back.โ€

17 โ€œI have no husband,โ€ she replied.

Jesus said to her, โ€œYou are right when you say you have no husband. 18 The fact is, you have had five husbands, and the man you now have is not your husband. What you have just said is quite true.โ€ John 4:15-18

Jesus speaks to the woman about truth.  Truth without condemnation.  Just the naked truth.  He goes on to share with her the truth about forgiveness of sins and salvation.  She had lived her life in sin and shame.  And kept doing the same thing over and over.  Thatโ€™s what shame does.  It envelopes us to twist our minds into feelings of worthlessness, self-doubt, self-destruction.

Throughout Jesusโ€™ three-year walk we see Him love and heal the sick, bring people into Godโ€™s service, comfort those in fear, teach so many about the ways of God.  And woven amongst the stories of His life are the counseling moments like the one at the well.  Moments where He uses all His God-given knowledge and skills to bring someone to a โ€œtruthโ€ reveal.

Isnโ€™t that what we seek when we ask a friend for advice about a problem?  Or go to a professional counselor concerning a life issue?  How can I fix this?  How can I fix me?  Unlike a teaching situation, where a topic outside ourselves is learned, seeking a wise counselor aims to reach into ourselves to find the โ€œwhy?โ€

So often when our own friends or family express concerns about their life we know the โ€œwhyโ€ but are afraid of the damage the truth might do to our relationship so we stay silent.  Thatโ€™s the challenge of being a wise counselor.  The culmination of all the Jesus traits.  

I believe the stories of Jesusโ€™ counseling moments are included in the Bible not just for us to see ourselves being counseled like the woman at the well.  They are included so we can also learn to help others.  Others who are hurting.  Others who are living in sin.  Others who donโ€™t know about the gift of forgiveness of self.

We need to take an inventory of how our individual lives, our fruit, our behavior are affecting the people we come in contact with.  The world is in such a desperate situation. Get yourself off your mind and see how you can bless someone else today.

Joyce Meyer

Join me this week, as we complete our series on The Jesus Mindset, in a deep dive into the methods of a wise counselor and how we might touch those around us, helping them to take a few bricks down from their strongholds.


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Solidarity

Make every effort to live in peace with everyone and to be holy; without holiness no one will see the Lord. 
Hebrews 12:14

I was having lunch the other day with a friend and she shared with me a disturbing trend in her two Bible study groups.  She said to me, โ€œIโ€™ve had it.  Iโ€™m exhausted.  I donโ€™t want to hear either side anymore.โ€  You see, the Christians in her group forgot who was in charge of their lives and the great gift of peace bestowed on believers.  They started arguing about politics.  In fact, one of her groups completely dissolved because of this.

When we think about the status of our faith, we usually concern ourselves inwardly.  But throughout the New Testament we are charged with guiding our fellow believers closer to Godโ€™s truths and blessings.

See to it that no one falls short of the grace of God and that no bitter root grows up to cause trouble and defile many.
Hebrews 12:15

So often that โ€œbitter rootโ€ that gets fomented in our churches, faith groups, Bible studies, etc causes people to disconnect from their faith journey.  And if we have joined in creating that situation, we must count ourselves at least partially responsible for the results.

It is easy to throw stones at others, but glass houses should whisper caution.

Charles Spurgeon on A Political Dissenter

Thatโ€™s not to say we arenโ€™t to discuss the worldly goings on and the effects they have on our lives.  But our primary focus should be always on God and being peacemakers.

When the Covid pandemic hit and a Bible study I was in was still meeting we were discussing our fears and such.  The group leader proclaimed, โ€œI believe God is sending us this pandemic as punishment for what we have done to the environment.โ€  Iโ€™m sure that just caused everyone reading this to divide into camps.  Now, I love the environment but Iโ€™m not an โ€œenvironmental activist.โ€  And that statement didnโ€™t sit well with me.  But instead of going on the attack I kept my mouth shut for once realizing that nothing I might say would change her mind or be helpful.

We seem to have evolved into a society where our opinions absolutely must be heard and must be accepted or else we are prepared to judge our โ€œadversaryโ€ in all manner of ways.  And when this happens within a Christian group, I can tell you one thing for sure, Satan is quite happy.

This quote by AW Tozer is a bit long but he handles this issue very well:

One thing must be kept in mind: We Christians are Christians first and everything else after that. Our first allegiance is to the kingdom of God. Our citizenship is in heaven. We are grateful for political freedom. We thank God for democracy as a way of life. But we never forget that we are sons of God and citizens of another city whose builder and maker is God. For this reason, we must not identify the gospel with any political system or make Christianity to be synonymous with any form of government, however noble. Christ stands alone, above and outside of every ideology devised by man. He does not join any of our parties or take sides with any of our great men except as they may come over on His side and try to follow Him in righteousness and true holiness. Then He is for them, but only as individuals, never as leaders of some political faction. The true Christian will be loyal to his country and obedient to those in authority, but he will never fall into the error of confusing his own national culture with Christianity. Christianity is bigger than any country, loftier than any civilization, broader than any human ideology.  

A.W. Tozer

Iโ€™ll be honest, Iโ€™ve really struggled with this issue for the last few years.  I want to live in Godโ€™s peace but I also am a lover of freedom and America.  For the last few months each time I work myself up to being outraged over some issue Iโ€™ve turned to God.  I remind myself that He is ultimately in charge.  I remind myself that my job, as a Christian, is to share His Word and live faithfully by it.  That means showing grace and compassion.  It also means โ€œallowingโ€ God to handle everything until He tells me He needs me to do my part.

When we truly desire to be peacemakers and have Christian solidarity as a goal, we change our conversations and words.  Instead of sending around an inflammatory news article or Facebook post to our Bible study group and letting it drop like a bomb, we should share with them the struggle we have with the issue and where we see God in it.  

The apostle Paul dealt with strife amongst some of the churches.  Because letโ€™s face it, our churches are just made up of people.  People with varying points of view and opinions.

I beg you that when I come I may not have to be as bold as I expect to be toward some people who think that we live by the standards of this world. For though we live in the world, we do not wage war as the world does. The weapons we fight with are not the weapons of the world. On the contrary, they have divine power to demolish strongholds. We demolish arguments and every pretension that sets itself up against the knowledge of God, and we take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ.  
1 Corinthians 10:2-6

We should not be โ€œwaging warโ€ like the world does.  Our fight should not be with each other โ€“ working to destroy one anotherโ€™s faith.  We need to turn our focus back on to God and help our brethren to do the same.  

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A Tiny Message #4

Therefore, since we have these 
promises,dear friends,ย let us 
purify ourselves from everything 
that contaminates body and spirit, 
perfecting holinessย out of 
reverence for God. 
2 Corinthians 7:1

When you think of the word “holy” the most likely target of our thoughts is God or Jesus. But the pursuit of holiness is what is required of us upon professing our faith. The word “sanctification” may be more aligned to what we think that process entails.

The ancient Israelites were tasked with bringing complicated offerings to God in order to work on their path toward holiness. Not only were the 10 commandments expected to be obeyed but many detailed animal sacrifices were to take place for the cleansing of sin. But the Israelites only could receive a shadow of complete forgiveness. As Christians, Jesus has taken the place of all those rituals. The rituals and forgiveness yes, but not the task of working toward holiness through obedience. I read this quote the other day while studying Leviticus that might help to spur us on toward right thinking about holiness.

Happiness, not holiness, is the chief pursuit of most people today, including many professed Christians. They want Jesus to solve their problems and carry their burdens but they don’t want Him to control their lives and change their character. It doesn’t disturb them that eight times in the Bible, God said to His people, “Be holy, for I am holy,” and He means it.

Warren Wiersbe on Leviticus

Let’s work together offering ourselves as living sacrifices so that our sanctification process brings us closer to God’s desire of holiness for us.

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Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat!

Out of the same mouth come 
praise and cursing. My brothers 
and sisters, this should not be. 
James 3:10

A prayer to avoid using coarse language

Holy Father, it has become so easy for me to use your name in un-holy ways.  There was once a time that when angered or frustrated I would just say some silly old saying.  But as I drew closer to the ways of the world my language followed.  I want to be closer to you instead, LORD.  I want to speak like your son, Jesus.  I know that anger, impatience, laziness, and bitterness are all roots of my use of foul language.  Help me, Holy Spirit, to cut out those roots so that out of my mouth comes praise, prayer, forgiveness and grace.  I will use my mouth, with your guidance, for these rather than obscenity and coarseness.  Amen


We all remember that moment well.  I was driving the middle school carpool that morning.  A car full of young, impressionable minds.  Just before I got to a busy intersection a car swerved over from another lane in front of me, causing me to hit my brakes.  And just as our basic driving skills become automated, my middle finger and mouth began its ugly automatic work.  The car went silent.  I was immediately convicted of my sin by five sets of enlarged eyes on me.

Youโ€™d think that instances like that wouldโ€™ve got me to stop cursing in anger but it hasnโ€™t.  In fact, knowing about three weeks ago that eventually Iโ€™d be writing this post I started more aggressively working on this problem.  And yet, just the other day I think I managed to use just about every curse word available when talking to my husband about politics.  

Nor should there be obscenity, 
foolish talk or coarse joking, 
which are out of place, but 
rather thanksgiving.  
Ephesians 5:4

Have you ever watched a movie where it seemed the director purposely had every actor place a curse word in every sentence the actors spoke?  I have.  And Iโ€™ve finally had to stop watching.  I understand when our anger rises up that we again allow our mouths to control our world.  But the gratuitous use of cursing is not something I understand.  Everything, to some people, is โ€œfโ€™ing (fill in the blank).โ€  Itโ€™s become just another adjective.  And yet, it isnโ€™t.

According to one researcher, we swear on average from 0.3% to 0.7% of the time โ€” a tiny but significant percentage of our overall speech.  Given the fact that the average woman speaks about 25,000 words a day that adds up to around 1,750 swear words per day.  Thatโ€™s a lot of sinful speaking.

When I worked in our local high schools, I would see the prevalence of swearing amongst our teenagers.  Each year it seemed to get worse and worse.  When I would admonish a student they would say, โ€œoops, it was just an accident.โ€  However, we all know that well-practiced behaviors become simply rote acts.  

We are told throughout the Bible and especially the New Testament that we, as believers in God and then Jesus, are to be set apart from this world.  

Let us behave decently, 
as in the daytime, not 
in carousing and drunkenness, 
not in sexual immorality and 
debauchery, not in dissension 
and jealousy. Rather, clothe 
yourselves with the Lord 
Jesus Christ, and do not 
think about how to gratify 
the desires of the flesh. 
Romans 13:13-14

This verse makes it clear, whether in daytime, nighttime, with Christian friends or non, in our work environment, our home, or alone in our car, we are to clothe ourselves with Jesus.  The worst I have ever read come out of Jesusโ€™ mouth was to call the Pharisees โ€œvipers.โ€  

In the United States, during the 19th century, there was a craze to come up with “mild oaths” or pseudo-swearwords that replaced profane words with inoffensive ones. They tended to be silly and even poetic. “Jumpin’ Jehoshaphat,” “Holy, Moly,” and “gee willikers!” were just a few. It was a sign of our Christian influence in society. Sadly, we seem to have lost not only that influence but our desire to be that influence.

My BSGsโ€™ (Bible Study Girls) favorite saying is โ€œimperfect progress.โ€  And thatโ€™s what Iโ€™m in the midst of โ€“ really, arenโ€™t we all?  And as I listen to our media, tv shows, music, and more accept that cursing Godโ€™s name as the โ€œnew normalโ€ I pray for the Holy Spirit to help me be set apart.  I want my โ€œnew normalโ€ to be for the glory of God, not for the fulfillment of my flesh.

If you want this too, add the prayer to your daily prayer list and watch and see how God works in your life!

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Wanted: God Expert

When he takes the throne of his kingdom, he is to write  for himself on a scroll a copy  of this law, taken from that of the Levitical priests.  It is to be with him, and he is to read it all the days of his life so that he may learn to revere the Lord his God and follow carefully all the words of this law and these decrees.  Deuteronomy 17:18-19

A prayer to be deeply knowledgeable about Godโ€™s Word

โ€œHoly God, I confess that I have spent much of my Christian life hearing your Word and yet not absorbing and living out our Word.  Iโ€™ve sat in your Holy presence at church and listened, then walked out of the doors and turned my thoughts solely on selfish and worldly pursuits.  So I often, when I hear a conviction through your Word, I think of someone else who needs to hear the message โ€“ all the while it is me that needs to accept the correction.  I allow my endless โ€œto do listsโ€ to take time away from learning more about you, from soaking my soul with your loving spirit.  I allow my โ€œstudyโ€ of your Word to just be catchy verses that scroll by on social media. LORD, with your teaching and guidance I will proclaim that I am deeply knowledgeable about your character through your Word.  I will be your faithful student.  I lift this up in Jesusโ€™ name, Amen.โ€ 


A year ago, my Bible Study Girls, as I call them, started meeting to study His Word.  We couldnโ€™t have ever predicted the tribulations our world went through just two months later.  As the Covid pandemic swept through the world, we moved from study to study, different books of the Bible and different topics.  We were committed to gleaning something about Godโ€™s character, something we could hold on to, from each study.  And we discovered a lot about ourselves.  

Know also that wisdom is 
like honey for you: If you  
find it, there is a future 
hope for you, and your hope 
will not be cut off. 
Proverb 24:14ย 

I finally became committed to setting aside Bible study time in the morning.  I found just by starting my day with the Word of God rather than the news or Instagram, set my day on the right footing.  But I want more.  I want to know everything I can about the Holy Being who created not just me, but every single living thing on this planet โ€“ including the planet.  I want to know what He expects of me and what I can expect of Him.

We spend a lot of our lives getting to know our family, friends, neighbors and co-workers.  Some of us even know a lot about people we will never meet like movie stars or famous authors.  How about we make that same commitment to knowing God?  We may think we know Him but Iโ€™d bet youโ€™d be surprised by a thing or two by truly delving into His character.

I want to be a โ€œGod Expert.โ€  I want to have His promises, His Word, His love for me imprinted on my heart and mind.  I know that in knowing Him I will experience true joy and lasting peace.

If you want this too, add the prayer to your daily prayer list and watch and see how God works in your life!

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Amazingly Grateful

Throughout this year the message I keep getting from every Christian source is to grow in my faith I need to learn about Godโ€™s character.  And to know Godโ€™s character we need to go to the one true source โ€“ His Holy Word.  The Bible is the most amazing reference book.  It changes every time you read it.  Iโ€™ve looked at the same passages at various times this year and discovered something new each time.  Even the simple verse, โ€œBe still and know that I am God,โ€ (Psalm 46:10) carries so much information.  Itโ€™s about trust, itโ€™s about slowing down, itโ€™s about getting quiet.  Itโ€™s also about placing God above all and realizing He is God and we are not.  

When viewed not only in context but also within the historical perspective the meanings grow even more.  Today in the United States we celebrate Thanksgiving โ€“ a now much maligned holiday.  To some itโ€™s been twisted to represent the killing of native Americans.  To others itโ€™s about the first Europeans working with the natives to survive.  While others simply celebrate the opportunity to be with family.  Hereโ€™s a bit of this dayโ€™s true history:

โ€œThroughout that first brutal winter, most of the colonists remained on board the ship, where they suffered from exposure, scurvy and outbreaks of contagious disease. Only half of the Mayflowerโ€™s original passengers and crew lived to see their first New England spring. In March, the remaining settlers moved ashore, where they received an astonishing visit from an Abenaki Native American who greeted them in English. 

Several days later, he returned with another Native American, Squanto, a member of the Pawtuxet tribe who had been kidnapped by an English sea captain and sold into slavery before escaping to London and returning to his homeland on an exploratory expedition. Squanto taught the Pilgrims, weakened by malnutrition and illness, how to cultivate corn, extract sap from maple trees, catch fish in the rivers and avoid poisonous plants.

In November 1621, after the Pilgrimsโ€™ first corn harvest proved successful, Governor William Bradford organized a celebratory feast and invited a group of the fledgling colonyโ€™s Native American allies, including the Wampanoag chief Massasoit. Now remembered as Americanโ€™s โ€œfirst Thanksgivingโ€โ€”although the Pilgrims themselves may not have used the term at the timeโ€”the festival lasted for three days.โ€  — History Channel

You see, we can make up what we think the first Thanksgiving is about but when we truly are interested in finding out the facts and the historical perspective it takes on so much more meaning.  Taking a national day to โ€œGive Thanksโ€ didnโ€™t become official for many years later and it was more about just that โ€“ giving thanks for the blessings God has bestowed us.

I asked my friends and family to share verses from Godโ€™s Word that have special meanings for them on this day of Thanksgiving.  To show appreciation and to give thanks for all the blessings God has bestowed on us these thousands of years โ€“ written in His Holy Bible.  Take a moment to look each one up and see if you find something new that speaks to you! And feel free to add your own in the comments.


โ€œSurely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord himself, is my strength and my defense; he has become my salvation.โ€ Isaiah 12:2 

I have had this written on my cupboard door since the beginning of my cancer trial this year.  To me says it all and I was cured!! Thanks be to God โ€“ Beverly

โ€œI have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33

When the trials come, I know I can endure them because Jesus has already overcome the world. โ€“ Brennen

โ€œBe still and know I am God.โ€ Psalm 46:10.

Itโ€™s very intimate to me. โ€“ Janet

โ€œTo me this is like the days of Noah, when I swore that the waters of Noah would never again cover the earth. So now I have sworn not to be angry with you, never to rebuke you again.โ€ Isaiah 54:9

Gods covenant of love and peace with us! โ€“ Madison

โ€œPeace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.โ€ John 14:27

This is one of my favorite scriptures but a little ironic in a funny way because itโ€™s said during Catholic mass, followed by the priestโ€™s instruction to โ€œshow one another a sign of peace,โ€ or in other words, say hi to the person sitting next to you. This always caused me anxiety at church because Iโ€™m kind of an introvert, but once I just let the words flow over me, especially in times of stress in daily life, I can sink into the peace of Godโ€™s love which is His gift to every single one us. โ€“ Laurel

“Have I not commanded you? Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid; Do not be discouraged, For the Lord your God will be with you wherever you go.” Joshua 1:9

When I recite this, I am reminded that I am not alone and I can feel strength from God coming back into me! โ€“ Betsy

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding;
in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” Prov. 3:5-6

This is comforting to me. During my immature Christian days, I thought God expected me to solve my own problems. Thankfully, he does not expect me to do this alone! God designed me to depend on Him and wants me to pray to Him because he knows what is best and will gladly answer my prayers and guide my decisions. I trust God more than anyone else when I need direction and answers. He knows me way better than I know myself . . . . what a relief and comfort! โ€“ Anita

“The thief comes only to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it more abundantly.” John 10:10

Itโ€™s a promise of hope and joy and peace not only to just survive but to thrive.ย ย God wants us to thrive and enjoy life. โ€“ Todd

“My sheep listen to my voice. I know them and they follow me.” John 10:27

Because Jesus knows me! Little ol’ me. He knows me by name and I am special to him. — Andrea