Tag: wisdom

bible study, Christian, Christian Church, christian encouragement, Uncategorized

Our Flappy Rudder

krisshetter

I sat there as only one of two women coaches in the room.  There were about 20 of us, coaching girls softball ages 7 to 15.  We had recently finished the fall season where I had told my assistant coach to never step foot on a field where I was coaching.  He constantly undermined my authority, which came to a head one night where he threatened me with physical harm.  Yes, this was kids’ sports at its finest.  So back to this meeting.  We were all there to be confirmed as coaches for the Spring season.  That assistant coach was also present.  He asked to speak before we were voted in by the board.  He went into a tirade about me and how if I were to be confirmed as a coach, he would go to the city parks and recreation board and have our field permit rescinded.  He and the president of the association got into a few aggressive back and forths.  I, however, spoke not a word.

He finally sat down.  A vote was taken and I was still a coach.  Afterwards, a number of the other male coaches came up to congratulate me – for being so brave and not getting into a yelling match.  They were very impressed.  I was escorted to my car where I sat for a minute and finally took what seemed like was my first breath after the hours long meeting.  I hadn’t spoken because I could barely even breathe.  I had been so scared I couldn’t speak.  I didn’t know it then but God was protecting me.  He knew had I spoken up among all those men, my “hero” status would’ve instead turned in to “shrill siren.”  By keeping my mouth shut I accomplished so much more.

“The tongue is a small part of the body but it makes great boasts.  Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark.”

James 3:5

How many times have we looked back at a conversation or disagreement and thought, “if I had just kept my darn mouth shut, I wouldn’t be in this situation?”  I don’t know about you but I don’t have enough digits to keep track.  While others may struggle with not knowing what to say, others of us say too much.  

“Set a guard, Oh Lord, over my mouth; keep watch over the door of my lips.”

PS 141:3

This needs to be tattooed on all our foreheads so that when we are talking (or yelling) to each other we can “get” the message.   I read recently the concept that words are just the outward expression of our hearts and minds.  When you see someone screaming in a police officer’s face these days, I think how shriveled their hearts must be.  They are literally out of their minds spewing hatred to another person.  When we have a false sense of righteousness, not true righteousness from the Truth of God’s Word, we get into areas of entitlement, judgement, self-worth, and envy.  

Our words matter and we shouldn’t use them to just fill up space or hurt people or say things to make us feel better.  I once worked with a man to whom silence was a way of life.  It made me very uncomfortable; my youthful self always needed to fill that void.  A topic or question would be thrown out and he would go silent.  Meanwhile, I’m across the table babbling away.  I definitely did not have spiritual maturity at the time.  Through life experiences and a pursuit of God’s wisdom I am learning to enjoy a bit of silence.  A bit.  As a parent, I struggled with this powerful tool.  As my kids got older, I realized silence could sometimes be scarier than a mom yelling on and on.  And when I yelled, filling that void, I said hurtful things.  Things that I can never take back.  

“With our tongue we praise our Lord and Father, and with it we curse human beings, who have been made in God’s likeness.”

James 3:9

That last part needs repeating – when we are cursing others, we are cursing people WHO HAVE BEEN MADE IN GOD’S LIKENESS.  And when we yell, scream, say hurtful things we do so with lack of grace, mercy and forgiveness.  But if we are faithful over small things – like our tongue – and use them to bless others then God has promised to make us rulers over bigger things.  If we can’t stop corrupting our whole body — hardening our hearts and going out of our minds– because we can’t control that little flappy part in our mouth, then why should God give us more?

I heard a pastor give a challenge the other day called “What If?”  It goes like this:

  1. What if we decided to stop cursing, right now, forever?
  2. What if we decided to never say another negative thing?
  3. What if we decided here and now to never complain?

I bet a whole lot of people around us would be blessed.  But that all sounds sooooo difficult!  Not when you have God by your side.  Not when we walk in the steps He wants for us.  Not when we decide to live the life He calls us to.  Yes, we will be tempted.  Yes, there will be trials and tests.  Because without those how do we know we are victorious?

“This is what we speak, not in words taught us by human wisdom but words taught by the Spirit, explaining spiritual realities with Spirit-taught words.”

1 Cor 2:13

In other words, when we live in God’s world, accept and practice His teaching, and turn to Him for guidance and prayer, it will be His Words spoken when we face trials and temptation.  Or maybe, no words at all.  We have the mind of Christ inside us.  We need to stop pushing Him aside and let Him rule that little, flappy rudder in our mouth.  And only then will be sent on the right journey He has called us to.

bible study, Christian, Christian Church, christian encouragement, Uncategorized

The Law of Love

krisshetter

Even though I can pretty much talk to anyone at anytime I don’t particularly like to talk to people when I’m coming home on an airplane from visiting my daughter.  I only get to see her about 4 times a year and when I leave her, I’m sad and contemplative.  I prefer to put my headphones on and read a book.  On one trip home, I sat next to a man who immediately started talking to me.  I’m not sure how we got on the subject of God, the Bible and faith but he was prepped.  He was ready to make sure I knew how much he knew about the “truth” of the Bible.  He could quote any scripture that would back up his point of view.  The trinity was false, according to him, because it promoted multi-theism.  And on and on he went.  When I would disagree, gently, he peppered me with more questions for which he already had answers.  He was looking for ways to “catch” me with improper theology.  It didn’t bother me.  I’m always interested to hear more about the Bible.  And I’m sure he wasn’t completely wrong.  He just seemed to be taking scripture out of context.  Towards the end, he started telling me about his church journey.  He jumped from church to church based on obscure theological differences.  He went from a large church, to a medium one, to a small gathering.  He finally landed on his perfect church – the church of one.  He called himself a “sabbathist.”  He didn’t practice the sabbath on Sunday.  It had to be Friday through Saturday.  So, if you were thinking you could join his group of one, you’d better make sure you worshipped and followed the rules on the right day.  

When we arrived in San Diego and exited the plane, I had one thought.  I had just met a real life, modern day Pharisee.  I had one regret.  I realized, squeezed into that packed airplane there had to have been multiple people hearing our conversation (or at least him talking since he did most of it).  The opportunity I missed was to stop talking doctrine and scripture and ask him the most important question, “But do you love Jesus?”    In that 3 ½ hours on the plane he never spoke of being a true disciple of Jesus.  He only spoke of following the Mosaic law.  I missed the chance to introduce him to the Royal Law – the Law of Love.

Pharisees cared more about strictly following Mosaic rules than they did about the idea behind God’s Word

This week James takes us through additional, difficult subjects: favoritism (yes, we all do it), loving our neighbor (even the gay couple), mercy (we all want it), and deeds (without being a “church lady”).  He recognizes that when we try to live by Mosaic Law alone, it’s like playing a game of “whack-a-mole.”  When we stop doing one thing another sin pops up.  We can never feel fully successful at living a sin-less life.  But what we can do is love one another.

Warren Wiersbe says this about James 2 and the steps we are to take to go from being a “baby Christian” to a mature Christian:

“Immature people talk about their beliefs, but the mature person lives his faith.  Hearing God’s Word and talking about God’s Word can never substitute for doing God’s word.”

Warren Wiersbe, New Testament Bible Commentary

Each of last week’s topics — trials, wisdom, listening, and living a clean life — were the personal building blocks for what James calls us to this week.  Without faith that God is ever present in our trials, without wisdom to discern what God calls us to, when we don’t listen to God, and when we give into immoral situations we continue to live by this world’s standards. 

“Show me your faith without deeds and I will show you my faith BY my deeds.”

James 2:18

James tells us we are called for something better.  We need to be living outside the box, not trapped inside.  First up tomorrow we will delve deeper into what following Jesus’s Law of Love looks like when we treat people like God does – equally.

Have you ever met a modern-day Pharisee?  What was your reaction?  Do you find yourself trying to adhere to scripture but forget that one of the most important commandments is loving others?

bible study, Christian, Christian Church, christian encouragement, Uncategorized

Jericho Walls Are Shaking

krisshetter

She remembered that night when she laid in her bed waiting and expecting.  Waiting and expecting her father to enter the room and sexually assault her, again.  But as she lay there she thought, “One day I will do something great.”  And great she did.  In 2005, Time magazine’s “25 Most Influential Evangelicals in America” ranked her as 17th.  She is known all over the world by her ministry and volunteer work.  Joyce Meyer overcame constant sexual abuse as a child because of hope and faith in God.

This week we looked at just one chapter in the Book of James.  Chapter one brought us front and center in how to deal with trials.  He spoke of spiritual wisdom and the wise act of listening and controlling our anger.   In just 26 sentences He stands in front of us in admonition to wake us Christians up. And show the world what trust in Jesus Christ, our savior really means.

Do not merely listen to the Word and so deceive yourselves.  DO WHAT IT SAYS.

James 1:22

He goes on to say that when we leave church, after we pray each morning, or read our devotional each day we ought not to then turn out into the world and forget who we are.  We are not like everyone else.  Isn’t that what our parents told us when we wanted to go hang out with the “cool kids?”  There are expectations and responsibilities to accepting Christ.

When I was a “baby Christian” I had a conversation about church with my mom.  She is the daughter of a Baptist minister.  She hasn’t regularly attended church since she was a child.  She doesn’t pray.   She says she believes in God but anyone that knows her couldn’t tell that to be true.  She told me that when she was a child at church, she would watch all the ladies attend church dutifully.  And then, they would gossip, hate each other, complain endlessly to her father, lie, cheat, and all other manner of sin.  My mother had and still has a dim view of “Christians.”   

When we leave the doors of church or our home we mustn’t forget who we are.

How many of us live our lives fully realizing that not only is God watching how we handle trials and temptations, but our non-Christian friends and neighbors?  Do they see you getting angry and yelling and gossiping?  Do they get a sense of peace from you during difficult times?  Are you easy to talk to because they know you will listen without judgement?  And are the words you speak back coming from a Godly place?  Do you turn down offers of socializing with friends and tell them it’s because you have a Bible Study you are committed to?  Have they heard you speak about your quiet time you spend with God, praying for others?  Do you tell others you will pray for them and do it immediately, with them?  What was the last book or movie or tv show you settled into?  Was it something where you could gain wisdom of God’s ways?

While sitting and listening to God to speak through me before I sat down to write this, the song “My Father’s House” started playing over and over in my head.  

The Jericho Walls are quaking

Strongholds are shaking

Love is breaking through

When the Father’s in the room

Cory Asbury, The FAther’s House

When we invite God into our lives during hardship, when we seek His wisdom, when we listen for His voice, and act as He wants us to, we experience His strength and love.  The shackles of sin and anger, the ugliness of self-degradation and self-centeredness give way to freedom.   Freedom to see His beauty in resolving problems.  Freedom to experience joy in even the most difficult of times. 

James pulls no punches.  But he always reminds us, in the midst of admonishment, of the “why.”  

  1. We will develop maturity and perseverance
  2. We receive the “crown of life” that the Lord has promised
  3. We are given the Word of Truth so we can be “firstfruits” of all God has created
  4. We live in the righteousness that God desires for us
  5. When we rid ourselves of immorality and accept the Word planted in us, we are saved
  6. We are given freedom
  7. We will be blessed in all we do

James is not asking us to do anything more than what we ask of our employees, our children or our friends.  If we make a commitment, promise, accept a job, want a friendship, then we must work on it and act in such a way as to say we are all “in.”

My challenge for this weekend it to be fully aware of our actions and words, especially while around non-Christians.  Good luck, my prayers are with you.

bible study, Christian, Christian Church, christian encouragement, Uncategorized

Oh, To Be Wise

krisshetter

They kept begging me to run for PTA president.  Having served on a PTA nominating committee I know how difficult it can be to fill two key positions – president and treasurer.  At least the treasurer can hide from people, but the president must stand in front of rooms filled with either at best bored or at worst annoyed parents.  My children attended an elementary school with almost 1,300 students K-5.  We put on large community events.  And our parents and teachers were very demanding.  On top of this, our school was about to go through a few major changes.  I told them “no.”  Actually, what I told them was: “You don’t want me to be your president.  You won’t like how I will clean up the ‘old boys’ way of doing things.”   But they kept asking. 

Eventually I caved.  I recall clearly after I said yes, I finally prayed for the first time.  “Lord, help this not to have been a mistake.”   I did that a lot many years ago.  You know, make a decision and then beg God to make it turn out ok.  I’m pretty sure King Solomon didn’t write a proverb saying, “Decide, then pray for your will be done.”

I should’ve watched Harper Valley PTA before I said, “Yes.

As I moved along on my Christian spiritual growth chart, I realized that order of things was a bit backward.  With each switching up of the order of prayer vs. action, I was getting closer to the concept in Ephesians 5: 15-16, “Be careful then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity. 

James 1: 5-8 challenges believers to wise decision making.  He gives us the action we must take (asking God for wisdom) and the result of not accepting and acting on that wisdom (double mindedness).

‘’If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you;  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord.  Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do.”

James 1: 5-8

You see, had I prayed to God in the midst of being asked to take on such a large role as PTA president I would’ve acted in God’s name, not mine.  If he told me to do it, I would know I had His strength to aid me in difficult times because it was His will not mine.  If I was told to not do it then I would’ve been able to clearly and confidently say, “no thank you.” And importantly – not feel guilty about it.

There are two ways to seek wisdom – spiritually and earthly.  While we can take both paths together, if we only use earthly knowledge, we live without an anchor to truly define what is “right” and “good.”  That is the Humanists’ approach.  They make decisions more based on what feels right or good or what society deems worthy or correct.  But God is immovable.  His Word never changes.  When we use that as a touchstone for our lives, we know we start our wisdom journey on solid ground.  God has all the solutions — while we can usually only see them in a narrow, protective framework.  

Charles Spurgeon once said, “How foolish would the believer be who would lay up his treasure anywhere except heaven?”  In other words, you only have one life to live.   It’s precious and what you create, such as children, are precious.  Why would you ask the world how to live your life, raise your kids, invest your money, use your time, instead of God?   He went on to say, “Change is written on the forehead of nature so don’t put your trust in earthly things.”  This reminded me of a friend I had at an old job.  She had her kids in the 1970s.  With her first child she was told by the nurses to absolutely not breastfeed her child.  It was imperative that women not be tied down to a child and instead be free to do whatever she pleased.  When her second child came along the winds had shifted.  She was encouraged to breastfeed.  She cried as she told me what she realized she missed out on with her first child – the bonding and loving moments breastfeeding affords.  She was angry she had let a nurse decide for her what was right and good. 

Warren Wiersbe defines God-given wisdom this way, “Wisdom keeps us in harmony with the principals and purposes that the Lord has built into His world so that as we obey God, everything works for us and not against us.”  I don’t know about you but I’d like to know more about how to get things to work for me and not against me!  

Step 1 for gaining that sort of wisdom – praying.  

But not just any praying.  Praying for His will to be done, not ours.  Praying for wisdom and good discernment means asking God to light the way for us.  He alone knows ALL the possible solutions and outcomes.  We can only know a limited number of solutions, based on our limited knowledge and emotions.  We can’t possibly know the outcomes.  When we pray to God for our will we need to be careful He might just give us what we keep asking for – and that can frequently be exactly what we don’t need.  God tailors our teaching based on where we are in our spiritual growth.  He might give us a little leeway or He might admonish us.  But we will definitely learn a lesson if we listen and pay attention.

Step 2 in our wisdom growth is listening.  

James 1: 19 says, “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this, we should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry.”  After we’ve prayed, we need to shut up and listen.  He will speak to you.  But if we keep yammering on to him, our friends, people we don’t even know on social media, we will assuredly miss His voice.  We need to be like Jesus – slow down and hear from God.  Instead we frequently start worrying and researching and talking and fretting and more worrying.  In my study group we asked the question: “What are some challenges that come with obeying the promptings of the Holy Spirit?”  We all agreed that discerning whether it is God or our own voice (or worse, Satan) speaking is the greatest challenge.  The solution is knowing the character of God.  Thankfully, there’s a complete autobiography about God at our fingertips – the Bible.

Step 3 is reading His word.  

I’ve heard people call Christians “sheep.”  The assumption is that we don’t need to think for ourselves once we turn our lives over to Christ.  But we don’t put our minds on a shelf and stop thinking.  In fact, we must turn our lives to more active thinking and discernment when we become Christians.  One of my BSGs (Bible Study Girls) and I were talking the other day and she told me she was glad the Bible can be read at different understanding levels.  She says she has always had a more difficult time delving deeper and between the lines – not just when it comes to reading the Bible but any literature.  She appreciates those of us that have that skill.  That is the beauty of the Bible and God’s gifts.  One friend of mine sent out a text that said, “The Bible is the only book that as you read it, it reads you.”  Amen to that! 

There are a few books in the Bible considered “wisdom books” but the most recognizable is Proverbs.  The words “wise” or “wisdom” are used 125 in this book.  Its wise words are made to be memorized since the people of that time didn’t have access to books.  One liners can be easily remembered such as:

“Those who forsake instruction praise the wicked, but those who heed it, resist them.” 28:4

“Whoever remains stiff-necked after many rebukes will suddenly be destroyed without remedy.” 29:1

“Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.” 21:9

“Better a dry crust with peace and quiet than a house full of feasting and strife.” 17:1

Then there’s longer, deeper instruction such as Proverb 1: 32-33

“For the waywardness of the simple will kill them and the complacency of fools will destroy them; but whoever listens to me (wisdom/God) will live in safety and be at ease without fear or harm.”

And Proverb 3:5-6: “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding.  In all ways submit to Him and he will make your path straight.”

I wish I had read that one before deciding to be a PTA president.  From day 1 the bickering and strife and lies and hurts I faced were almost unbearable.  I cried to the Lord for help.  His help came in the form of wisdom – how to pray first, listen second, and read His Word third and then act.  

In my Bible study library I now have Bible commentaries, devotionals, books about prayer, apologetics books and more.  When I read a passage in the Bible that either seems confusing or sounds like a message I really need to hear, I pull out various other tools to help guide me, in addition to praying over the verse.  This has expanded my study time from about 15 minutes to about an hour.  It centers me for the day ahead and places my feet on His path.

Praying, listening, reading.   These steps help us to gain God’s wisdom.  Without taking these steps it’s very difficult, if not impossible, to accomplish God’s plan for us.  I love what Proverbs 8 says, speaking as God’s Wisdom:

“Listen, for I have trustworthy things to say; I open my lips to speak what is right. My mouth speaks what is true, for my lips detest wickedness.  All the words of mouth are just; none of them is crooked or perverse.  To the discerning all of them are right; they are upright to those who have found knowledge.  Choose my instruction instead of silver, knowledge rather than choice gold, for wisdom is more precious than rubies, and nothing you desire can compare with her.”

I am issuing a challenge today.  Take Proverbs and create a “Wise Words” list.  Create categories that each 1 liner falls into and place it in its category.  Some of the proverbs are repeated so you don’t need to write them again – but you might put a tick mark by the verse to show how many times it is mentioned.

For comments today, let us know a time that either 1) you didn’t pray and got yourself into a mess or 2) you heeded God’s word and realized what a blessing it was!