galatians 5

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To Be The 3rd Man

June 23, 2023June 23, 2023 krisshetter

During the last five years or so I started gaining the dreaded hormonal weight. As a woman over 50 I’ve watched a donut grow around my waist. Being tall, I can frequently hide this mysterious weight gain but I know it’s there. So of course, I decided to try and diet my belly away. I successfully lost weight through a program called Noom, multiple times. Yes, after about a year of relishing my new body, the weight crept back on. My second stint with Noom saw the same weight loss and eventual gain. I constantly blame myself for failing to have enough self-control so I don’t become “fat grandma” instead of “fit grandma.” And while I do recommend the Noom program – which isn’t really a diet at all but rather a healthier way of looking at food – it lacks one feature that would make it complete. God.

The Christian way of self-control is not “Just say no!” The problem is with the word “just.” You don’t just say no. You say no in a certain way: You say no by faith in the superior power and pleasure of Christ. It is just as ruthless. And may be just as painful. But the difference between worldly self-control and godly self-control is crucial. Who will get the glory for victory? That’s the issue. Will we get the glory? Or will Christ get the glory? If we exercise self-control by faith in Christ’s superior power and pleasure, Christ will get the glory.”
John Piper, The Fierce Fruit of Self-Control

How many times in your life have you sought to abstain or control a behavior that is destructive or just isn’t serving you well by thinking, “I just need to say no!” ? And yet over and over you fail. Sometimes in little bits and sometimes with flair. It seems the one thing we tell ourselves over and over not to do is exactly what we find ourselves doing. But take heart, we are not alone.

“I do not understand what I do. For what I want to do I do not do, but what I hate I do. And if I do what I do not want to do, I agree that the law is good. As it is, it is no longer I myself who do it, but it is sin living in me. For I know that good itself does not dwell in me, that is, in my sinful nature. For I have the desire to do what is good, but I cannot carry it out. For I do not do the good I want to do, but the evil I do not want to do—this I keep on doing. Now if I do what I do not want to do, it is no longer I who do it, but it is sin living in me that does it.” Romans 7:15-20

Paul, we feel your pain. He sounds exactly like the second type of man that C.S. Lewis describes in his essay about the three types of man. The one we looked at in the last post who has a divided mind. Thankfully, Paul does not leave us in this fretful state. He makes a right turn into Mr. Lewis’ third man.

“Who will rescue me from this body that is subject to death? Thanks be to God, who delivers me through Jesus Christ our Lord!” ….” Therefore, there is now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus, because through Christ Jesus the law of the Spirit who gives life has set youfree from the law of sin and death. Romans 7:24-25 & 8:1-2

A life free from sin, death and I might add, shame. Sounds like a pretty good place to be, doesn’t it? How do we get there? How do we stop being double-minded, trying to put our weight on that wobbly rock and instead on the only solid rock we need? First, by declaring Jesus as our Lord and Savior. And secondly, turning our entire life over to Him.

You see, the third man in Mr. Lewis’ essay has done something violent. They have fiercely killed their old self. All their time, their thoughts, their actions, emotions, belong to God which means it also belongs to them because they are His. It is a daily choice to submit their all to Him. This man is joyfully obedient, not sullenly dragged to do good.

The abundant life is a choice you make day by day to embrace God who created you to be. Becoming the masterpiece God formed you to be is a lifelong process, but it is worth it because of the beautiful, unique reflection you become of your Savior.”
Charles Stanley, God’s Purpose for Your Life

The first time I realized the cycle of failure in not including God in seeking a better, fruit-filled life was when I attempted to stop cursing. Throughout my day I told myself to not curse. Of course, I found myself doing it more! My thoughts were placed on the wobbly rock – my own self. And cursing was what was on my mind. It wasn’t until I placed them in the Holy Spirit’s hands that I found success. When in trigger situations I turned to God, even for a brief moment. “What would He want out of me right now? Anger or love?”

“For if you live according to the flesh, you will die; but if by the Spirit you put to death the misdeeds of the body, you will live.” Romans 8:13

Friend, just as in all the other Fruits of the Spirit, biblical self-control is not the same as the world’s. The world says, “Try harder. And when you fail, sit in shame.” God, on the other hand, assumes you cannot be the only member in this fight of wills. He tells us to put on our full armor – His Word, salvation, peace, truth, the righteousness gifted to you, and the shield of faith. We take this armor and call it trust. Trusting in the only solid rock that can hold our weight and get us safely to the other side of the river.

When you see the words “self-control,” don’t jump to all the things you contemplated in your personal inventory and think, “I can fix this.” Instead, drop to your knees and cry out to the Holy Spirit for help. As the two of you begin a new life and new self together you will find your “have to’s” turning in to “get to’s.” Your new self allows the light of the Lord to shine on all areas of your heart and mind.

For me, I stop thinking about cursing and turn to love and kindness and gentleness. For others they stop being angry and unforgiving and experience patience and peace and joy. We stop obsessing over our needs, for our bodies, our hearts and minds and instead ask God what He wants of us. In other words, we stop growing weeds and start blooming and living a full Christian life.

Thank you for joining me on this journey through the Fruit of the Spirit! Be sure to follow the blog to receive your notice about the next series!

The acts of the flesh are obvious: sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions ²¹and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like. I warn you, as I did before, that those who live like this will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace,forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law. Those who belong to Christ Jesus have crucified the flesh with its passions and desires. Since we live by the Spirit, let us keep in step with the Spirit. Galatians 5:19-25

Faithfulness in Action

June 9, 2023June 5, 2023 krisshetter

When you look up the top qualities essential in any lasting relationship, you’ll find the essence of pistis. That’s the Greek word found in the list of the fruit of the spirit passage in Galatians 5:22 concerning faithfulness. Three definitions of pistis include our relationship to God, our attitude about trusting God and Christ and lastly, having a moral conviction or assurance. When it comes to our relationship with others this last definition of pistis reveals itself in these ways according to an article in Psychology Today:

I am trustworthy.
I am honest with others.
I am generally very dependable.
I am loyal to the people I care about.
I am easily able to trust others.

My question today is: when you look at this list can you confidently say “yes that’s me” to all of them? If so, you are the living proof of the fruit of faithfulness.

All the fruits listed by the apostle Paul can be viewed in these ways: God’s relationship with us, our inner relationship with Him, and the manifestation of that relationship to the world. Too often we forgo that last part. We say we know the love of God and love God but is the proof seen by how we love others? When James tells us, “Faith by itself if not accompanied by action, is dead” (Ja 2:17) it should cause us to step back and do a self-analysis of our works in the name of Christ.

The age-old discussion about faith and works so often looks at one or the other. While yes, we are saved by faith alone, the proof of that faith is our works in His name. Some might ask, why do I need to prove my faith to anyone? While it is dangerous to think we need to prove something to the world we must have a heart change when we are re-born in faith. That heart seeks to prove to God how much we love, trust and place all our life in His hands. We do His will each and every day. And His will, as written over and over in the Bible is to be honest, trustworthy, dependable, loving, caring, good stewards of our treasure and blessings, all while seeking to help others.

"Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share." 1 Timothy 6:18

I am thankful to say I believe the people around me can say that I have always been a loyal, trustworthy and dependable friend. What I can’t say is that I have always been this way in the Lord’s name. Before giving my life over to Christ my motivations were based on not wanting others to think badly of me and I held my convictions up in pridefulness. And now? I can say I apply these traits in ways I would never had in the past. When God asks me to be dependable to someone I’d rather just not have in my life I tell Him: “yes, if it is your will.” If He asks me to make a hard choice, one that will display my trustworthiness, I say, “yes.”

That’s the difference between acting as a person of the world and a daughter of Christ. He’s going to ask you to be faithful to Him and do things in faithfulness for others that our flesh screams against. That, my friend is real pistis.

I have a dear friend who has been asked by God to befriend someone who is difficult to love. It’s not a relative or a longtime acquaintance. It’s a fairly new person in her life. I watch and listen as she lives in obedience and faithfulness to God in this situation. The dependableness she shows this other person is the proof of her faithfulness, not just to God but to the world around her. There is no grumbling, gossip, or “donkeyness” (you know, being dragged to do good). She does it out of love for her Father who loves her deeply.

Friends, some of you regularly back out of commitments, we tell little lies to cover up our transgressions, we drop our friends at the first sign of conflict. Before God can trust us in the work He wants us to do for the kingdom let’s start with the small stuff in our own lives. Not because we have to but because we are faithful to a God who is faithful to us. It might just shock a few people into wondering about this change in you. And when asked we can say, “God is doing a good work in me.”

Impatiently Waiting

May 24, 2023April 28, 2023 krisshetter

There must not be many other words in human language that can evoke as much negative response as the word “wait.” For what? How long? Why? No one likes to wait it seems. We don’t want to wait in line, wait for the doctor, wait for the test results, wait for the phone call and so much more. We’ve created online shopping so we don’t have to wait to go searching around town for what we need. We have fast food so we don’t have to wait to cook a homemade meal. And although modern conveniences can help us to accomplish other, more important tasks, there are plenty of things worth waiting for. The birth of child, a harvest, the right spouse, freshly baked bread are but a few!

There are, however, clear times that, if we want to blossom as Christians, we need to not only wait but wait patiently, not allowing our fleshly desires to supersede God’s omniscience. To marry or not, to have children, take that job, move to another home, how to deal with difficult people or situations, medical decisions – all these potentially life-altering choices should be sought patiently in wisdom with the Lord. I have heard from too many Christians about failed marriages because they were too impatient to wait for the right person.

“Do not run ahead of God! The delays may be very challenging for you, but they are growing your faith in Him. Look to Him, strengthen yourself in His Word and love, remain confident that He is working on your behalf.”
Charles Stanley, 30 Life Principles

So ok, we get it. We need to wait on God’s wisdom. But the waiting isn’t the fruit. The waiting is the fertilizer, the opportunity for the fruit, which is patience in that waiting.

My friends and family know I have not typically been a patient person. I’m a doer. I make decisions and get things done. I hate waiting around for other people. Until one day it hit me. What does my impatientness (another word I made up) look like to the world? If I were to ask you the characteristics of an impatient person, you’d probably say someone who looks angry, frustrated, annoyed, maybe even beligerent. To the world it looks like someone lacking in the other fruits — love, joy and peace.

My getting frustrated in waiting was fruit killing. The killer spray I was using on my fruit was my pride. I knew better how to make things happen faster, more efficient, more productive. I knew better than almost anyone I encountered, especially God. And the world says, “Why should I be a Christian if I still look like that?”

They claim to know God, but by their actions they deny him. They are detestable, disobedient and unfit for doing anything good.  Titus 1:16

Yikes! Talk about a conviction. True patience isn’t really just a lack of doing something. It’s also about what’s going on inside our hearts and heads. Are we thinking loving, joyful thoughts during a “waiting” moment? Do we have peace from God knowing He has a plan for us in this time? Because I’ll tell you my friend, if we stand in line tapping our foot and being annoyed we might just miss the opportunity to help an elderly person who is struggling with her groceries.

The line, the wait, is just as long for Christians and non-Christians. Are we to be the same in how we deal with it? Or are we to remember “the eye of life’s tornados is the calm hope of our final destination” as Christian author Dane Ortlund observes? At all times.

These short term opportunities for patiently waiting help build up our long-term waiting muscles. When the pregnancy hasn’t happened, yet. When the right job hasn’t come along, yet. When the pain hasn’t gone away, yet. When our sons and daughters haven’t accepted the Lord, yet. These aren’t times to get impatient. They are times to show the world what we believe is true.

Each of those “yets” is a hope we place in God’s faithful, loving hands. He’s asking us to trust Him, just like He asked Abraham, the Israelites, and the apostles. He’s saying, “Wait.” More importantly He’s saying, “Wait patiently without fretting, without worry, without fear. Trust me.”

Is there something you are hoping for today? Ask Him in prayer. Then wait patiently. It may not be answered today or tomorrow or even in 10 years. But during that time of patience He will do great things in and through you.

Coming up: From Endurance to Hope

The State of Peacefulness

May 17, 2023May 17, 2023 krisshetter

Throughout the last three years with my Bible study girls (BSGs) I noticed what we all struggle with the most — control. Or on the flipside, lack of trust. The results of that need to control typically lead to lack of peace. We humans like to manage situations and people without first consulting the “man upstairs.” The inevitable results create frustration, hurt feelings, anger and more.

Instead, we turn to the desires of the flesh listed just above the fruits of the Spirit in Galatians 5: sexual immorality, impurity, debauchery, idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions, and envy.

We must picture hell as a state where everyone is perpetually concerned about his own dignity and advancement, where everyone has a grievance, and where everyone lives with the deadly serious passions of envy, self-importance, and resentment.
C.S. Lewis, The Screwtape Letters

You may look around your own Bible study groups, church friends or even just the “good” people you know and think, “Nah, we never do any of that horrible stuff!” You might recall, however, at the beginning of this study on love that Jesus considers gossiping or defaming someone “murder.” Yikes!

We take our newly signed peace treaty with God and consider it a license to do what our flesh desires. Maybe thinking He won’t notice. We turn from the peace table, walk out the door and get angry at the first person who doesn’t do what we think they should. We fantasize of a spouse who would love us so much better, we drink away our anxieties, hold onto our bank accounts for fear of the poorhouse, speak of “Karma” when hurt by others, become jealous of our non-Christian neighbors with the fancy new car, or just turn away from others who need a bit of kindness.

Friend, God has implanted in each and every one of us the knowledge of His existence. Somehow, we all know what His desires are for our behavior, for our hearts.

"Therefore, get rid of all moral filth and the evil that is so prevalent and humbly accept the word planted in you, which can save you." James 1:21

We know, through the Holy Spirit what is right and wrong in God’s view. When we actively or even passively work against this you know what the inevitable result is? Lack of peacefulness. That niggling in your heart and mind is God’s way of reminding you of the path toward peace. And yet we so often ignore it. We’ve been rejecting the Prince of Peace and His path since He walked on this Earth.

“On the next Sabbath almost the whole city gathered to hear the word of the Lord. When the Jews saw the crowds, they (the Pharisees) were filled with jealousy. They began to contradict what Paul was saying and heaped abuse on him. Then Paul and Barnabas answered them boldly: “We had to speak the word of God to you first. Since you reject it and do not consider yourselves worthy of eternal life, we now turn to the Gentiles.” Luke 13: 44-46

How incredibly sad is this point in scripture? The Pharisees and Sadducees were spoon-fed by Jesus, Himself, the truth. The glory of the heavens was opened to them. The bountiful, beautiful life was placed on a platter before them and they rejected it out of jealousy. Out of fleshly desires. Do we want to be listed among them? I pray your answer is no.

I heard a podcast recently by John Ortberg on taking a hold of the beautiful life God wants for us. He spoke of not just cutting out actions and thoughts from our lives but more importantly replacing them with a positive action and thought. The Bible speaks of cleaning house but not leaving it empty for the thief to come and take up residence. Therefore, if we want not just the glorious peace with God but God’s gift of peacefulness, we need to replace our desires of the flesh with His goodness. With the blossoms of love and joy. With trust that our God does in fact know what He is doing. He is greater than us in every aspect and will provide.

Through prayer, obedience and knowledge of His Word we can, with the Holy Spirit’s guidance, rest in His peace. Ask Him today to shine a light on the areas that are creating deadly weeds in our hearts. The Great Gardner will create a beautiful peacefulness in you that you never could’ve imagined!

Coming Up: Resting In Peace

A Gardener of Love

May 5, 2023May 5, 2023 krisshetter

She turned to drugs and alcohol to dull her childhood pain. The pain inflicted by an abusive, angry father. Her body was being ravaged by anger, hatred and shame. The feelings of worthlessness. And Jesus met her one night in an incredible vision. Upon waking she instantly accepted Him as her new, eternal, loving Father and set aside drugs and alcohol. It was her offering, her gift back to the Lord, however, that most likely had Him dancing in heaven. It wasn’t a payment because the Lord saves us without cost from us, without our need to do anything but say, “yes.” No, it was the only thing she really had to offer – love. Not just for the Lord but for her earthly father.

I met Julie* in a home Bible study. During the next few years, I watched as this daughter of God set aside her anger and any need for retribution while she travelled out of state to help care for her ailing father. Not once did I hear her speak ill of him again. She didn’t seek platitudes for her service to this man who had emotionally and physically abused her. She didn’t see it as an annoyance. No, she tended to her father as Jesus’ bond-servant. Sent in His name.

You, my brothers and sisters, were called to be free. But do not use your freedom to indulge the flesh; rather, serve one another humbly in love. ¹⁴For the entire law is fulfilled in keeping this one command: “Love your neighbor as yourself. ¹⁵If you bite and devour each other, watch out or you will be destroyed by each other. Galatians 5:13-15

And what are the desires of the flesh? “Sexual immorality, impurity and debauchery; idolatry and witchcraft; hatred, discord, jealousy, fits of rage, selfish ambition, dissensions, factions and envy; drunkenness, orgies, and the like.” (Gal 5:19-21). Placed right there in the middle could probably be seen as the root of the rest of those desires – selfishness. Our need to receive retribution from those who have hurt us. We want so much to cry out, “but, but, but!” and list our excuses as to why we can’t show someone love.

Pride leads to every other vice: it is the complete anti-God state of mind…… it is Pride which has been the chief cause of misery in every nation and every family since the world began.
C.S. Lewis

When we place ourselves as “better than” the root of hatred is sown. “I would never do such a thing” when in fact we may do a version of such action daily. It is a well-honed habit that is encouraged by the world. While I may not ever murder a person as the Law warns I certainly have held murderous thoughts, which Jesus calls equal to the actual act.

How does one reach the point of loving and maybe even helping those who we just want eliminated from our lives? How do we till a blooming, beautiful garden in our hearts, not one filled with weeds? Julie sought to worship God through her actions. She knew that harboring ill feelings toward her father only hurt one person – herself. When called by her stepmother for help she stepped forward in faith. Faith that the Lord wanted her to show mercy and grace.

As for me? It’s taken me many years but I finally sought wisdom from the God who provides it generously (James 1:5). The Holy Spirit has shown me it’s better to love than to feel hate and anger. I call that hate the “Black Swirly Ball” that wants to spin around in my chest from time to time. I’m listening to the Spirit when it allows me to feel out of balance. I get quiet, turn off the tv, the music, the phone and say, “Reveal to me what’s going on, Lord. Show me where my pride or my need to be in the right is shoving out love. Help me to pray for that person, not about them.” You see I want that Black Swirly Ball to unravel and loosen my chest. Then I can breathe the fresh air of God’s beauty. I give it up to God and I ask the Holy Spirit to help me not grab it back – ever. I bring my raw emotions to the Lord and He clears my mind. Often, He asks me to serve those I find difficult to serve. When I do, I demonstrate to the people around me the work Christ has done in my heart.

My friends, if all we ever are able to do in the name of love is pray for the revealing light of God to enter into our “enemy” we’ve tilled the soil for something good to happen in us. We’ve said to Jesus, “yes, I will love as you have loved me, a sinner for sure.” We just need to be prepared for Him to ask us to take a step further and say, “Yes.” In our real and true faith, we must believe without doubting that He will work it for our good and His glory.

“You have flaws, failures, and quirks that annoy and anger others. In fact, you may be more like those whom you dislike than you’d care to admit. But Jesus still loves you and died for you – just as He did for them. What Christ did for you on the cross, He did for your worst enemy. It’s when you humbly accept this fact that you can begin to love others as Jesus does.”
Charles F. Stanley

Do you believe God? Not just believe in God but have real faith in His words and promises. If you do then you know He wants the best not just for you and your friends and family but for all people. That person at work who is causing you so many troubles? Show her love by seeing her as someone who has the weight of sin on her and needs your loving prayers. The family member who speaks ill of you to the rest of the family? He needs you to love him enough to ask God to intervene in his life. The abortionist, false teacher, dictator, murderer, thief, liar all need you. These people in one way or another are separated from God and I can’t think of a more terrible fate for which we should grieve.

Jesus commands us to love. To love others as we are loved by Him, sinners one and all. This week I encourage you to demonstrate your real faith and experience the greatest fruit ever to blossom from us – love.

*Julie is not her real name