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Stop Pretending

One person pretends to be rich, yet has nothing;
    another pretends to be poor, yet has great wealth. Proverbs 13:7

According to an article in Psychology Today the advent of social media brought about a terrible case of lying.  Lying about our weight, our age, our financial status, social standing, looks, and well, just about everything about ourselves.   In a study that reviewed 80 online daters, researchers found that two thirds of participants lied about their weight by five pounds or more. In a large sample of over 2,000 people in England 43 percent of men admitted to making up facts about themselves and their lives that were not true.  Most commonly, participants said that they only shared “non-boring” aspects of their lives (32 percent) and were not as “active” as their social media accounts appeared (14 percent).

Some might say, eh, what’s the big deal?  While we humans like to think we are individually responsible for our own health and well-being we actually are in a giant social contract with each other.  When a young teen looks at people online having the time of their lives 24/7 they may think, “why is my life so boring?”  Unhappiness, dissatisfaction, loneliness, or worse, thoughts of harming themselves are paths many may take when evaluating their own “normal” lives.

I remember having this very conversation with my youngest daughter her first year of college.  “Everyone else that went off to school seems to be so happy.  Why am I struggling?” she once said.  I reminded her that very, very few people post the other 12 or 18 hours of their day when they are studying for a test, sitting alone having lunch, or crying from homesickness.  


Our wise words today speak to how we show our wealth or lack thereof.  But in the larger scheme of things, it’s about pretending to be something we are not.  I can’t help but think this comes from a place of looking for love and affirmation in the wrong places. God loves you when you have money and when you don’t.  He loves you when you are doing boring things like taking out the trash.  He loves you when you are on a fabulous vacation or quietly reading a book on the couch.

Friend, God loves you when you are being true to your situation.  You don’t need to pretend to be something you aren’t.  So stop trying to keep up with the influencers who stood in line for three hours to get that perfect shot in Malta.  If all you can do for a vacation is take a hike in your nearby woods, enjoy every single minute of it.  God is with you and loves you right where you are.

Lord, help me shine for the person you made me to be right now.  I want to be thankful for the blessings you have given me.  I know you love me whether rich or poor.  Whatever you have blessed me with help me to bless others by being genuine and true.  Amen

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Taking Offense

Fools show their annoyance at once,
    but the prudent overlook an insult. Proverbs 12:16

This is the second rendition of today’s post.  When I started this blog over two years ago, I asked the Holy Spirit to speak through me.  If writing a particular post felt like I was pulling teeth I knew it wasn’t coming from the right source.  As a result, the post I wrote earlier went into the “delete” pile.  Each sentence I wrote was interrupted either by texts, my husband, timers going off, etc.  I now realize every time my mind wandered to one of those interruptions it was a tap on my shoulder to re-focus and re-write.

You see what was happening in the background of my original text was this very proverb.  I was getting annoyed and offended by problems surrounding an event I am hosting.  It only took me about a half a day to finally figure it out.  The Holy Spirit giving me a real life example of practicing what I preach!  


Being offended has risen to an artform these days. We are offended by other drivers, cashiers, politicians, neighbors, strangers, businesses, faceless people in our social media threads, our friends, our family, our spouses and on and on.  If “they” don’t conform to our wants and needs, it might ruin our day.  If “they” don’t act how we think they should we are hurt and insulted.  No grace and definitely no mercy.  

We take for granted that God won’t do the same to us.  Thank goodness because we all probably offend Him multiple times a day.  While He may allow our sinful actions to suffer the corresponding consequences, He isn’t sending down bolts of lightning to smote us each time we mess up.  He hasn’t washed His hands of us because He’s had it for the last time.

Friends, it’s time to step back and control our emotions.  We have in Jesus the perfect example for us today.  He was whipped, beaten, stabbed, spit on, forsaken by friends, and hung on a cross yet He still loved.  He still asked God to grant mercy.  Today, can’t we do the same with the brothers and sisters around us who are probably doing their best to make it through this day just like you?  I, for one, got this message loud and clear today.

Gracious God, thank you for your mercy.  Help me to deliver that same mercy and grace to those around me who might insult me or cause offense.  I thank you for teaching me how to seek peace throughout my days.  Amen

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Be Generous 

 
A generous person will prosper;
    whoever refreshes others will be refreshed. Proverbs 11:25

For a few years in a row a person in my family would give us all lottery tickets as part of our Christmas gifts.  It was a chance to win thousands of dollars but we usually came away with a few dollars between us all.  It was a fun activity during the middle of gift giving.  If you’ve ever scratched off a lottery ticket in the United States there’s a place on the back to put your name and address so if you were to hit it big, you’d mail the ticket in to receive your winnings.  The odd part about our Christmas tickets was this: the gift giver would always place their name and address on the back of the ticket.  What they were saying was, “Here’s a fun gift but if you win anything it’s mine.”

Generosity is not a natural behavior for many of us.  For some, we can be tightfisted and stingy.  For others, generosity seems like second nature.  It wasn’t until around the 18th century that our modern view of generosity became more commonplace.  Before that it was thought only people with “means” could act admirably and with virtue.  However, the concept of generosity in the Christian realm can be seen throughout scripture, with its culmination in the lesson of God sacrificing His only Son for our salvation.  The apostle Paul regarded generosity as proof of the genuine character of Christian love. 

I love one of the descriptions of generosity by the Generosity Research Center at Notre Dame University: “Generosity involves giving to others not simply anything in abundance but rather giving those things that are good for others. Generosity always intends to enhance the true wellbeing of those to whom it gives.”


Looking back at our proverb today you’ll see the word “refresh.”  It aligns perfectly with this description.  Refreshing or enhancing the wellbeing of another reveals itself in many ways, depending upon that person’s or group’s needs.  When we truly provide for another person or recognize an opportunity to fill a need, we will be blessed by seeing the other shine.  Generosity need not be an economic exchange.  Even when money is involved it should primarily be an action of the heart.

Friend, generosity is something to be cultivated and practiced.  It starts with answering opportunities with an open heart.  It’s important to remember God didn’t go halfway.  Jesus suffered a painful death for everyone.  Giving us all an opportunity to live a blessed life when we believe and are obedient to Him.  He doesn’t need us for Him to be whole but I can only imagine how blessed He must feel when another person accepts His gift.  As Christians, modeling this generosity should be a daily priority.

Holy Father thank you for being so generous to have given your only Son to enhance our lives for all eternity. Place me in situations so that I can also express generosity to those around me.  Amen

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Less Babbling, Please 

"Sin is not ended by multiplying words,
    but the prudent hold their tongues." Proverbs 10:19

I was tempted to not write anything for this verse.  It surely speaks for itself.  It’s a lesson I should have tattooed on my wrist so I never forget it!  When I am nervous, angry, excited, or joyful, I talk.  I babble.  I had to apologize recently to a fairly new friend about my babbling.  She introduced me to her friends and I found myself a brook overflowing with silly words.  I walked away praying, “I did it again!  Why can’t I just be normal and stop talking??”  

The Holy Spirit, boy does He deserve a medal in trying to help me with this.  I think He sees progress.  I am being more discerning about keeping my mouth shut when others share their difficulties.  I’m not always jumping in and giving my personal or political opinion.  I’m also refraining from feeling the need to lash out when offended.  I’m seeing the fruit of zipping my lips.  Shocking, isn’t it, when we take God’s Word to heart how it seems to actually work?

So today my friend, here’s a challenge, unless asked for your opinion, don’t give it.  If someone is sharing a story, don’t add your own.  If you are confronted by a stranger, as Dr. Laura used to say, “smile and wave.”  Zip your lips for a day.  You just might find a bit more peace.

Holy God, although I know you enjoy a joyful noise on occasion, I also know you appreciate the beauty of silence.  Help me today to be silent when needed.  Amen.

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Taking The Easy Way   

 “Let all who are simple come to my house!”
To those who have no sense she says,
17     “Stolen water is sweet;
    food eaten in secret is delicious!”
18 But little do they know that the dead are there,
    that her guests are deep in the realm of the dead. Proverbs 9:16-19

There’s a great debate raging in the United States today about achieving equity through stealing.  Where I live, a law was changed so that if you steal less than $950 and are caught you might receive a small fine.  As a result of this change, reported (much goes unreported) larceny as has gone up 3% in just one year.  Property crime has increased in 24 counties throughout the state.  Stores are closing in areas where shoplifting has skyrocketed.  As one woman put it in an interview, “If I need diapers or formula who is going to get it for me?  They aren’t out there arresting people for shoplifting and everyone knows it.”

Now this post isn’t a spotlight on political missteps or any particular point of view.  But there are consequences when we choose to live and make decisions outside God’s plan for us.  And one of the oft repeated admonitions in Proverbs is about laziness or taking the easy way out.  Some argue that being against allowing people to steal for what they call “basic needs” is racist or discriminatory.  But what really is at work in this particular issue is people who are not in need, such as politicians and activists, taking the easy path.  “Well, if we just let people steal without punishment that solves the problem, right?”

There are free needle exchange programs, safe drug taking areas, laws removed to allow for sleeping on the streets, money thrown at problems, etc.  None of these choices make us step back and take the harder, more intricate path.  Some would say they exacerbate the very issues we are trying to resolve.  As Christians we should be convicted to be more thoughtful and loving and wise.  To have the desire to help God’s fellow sheep be lifted from sin and despair.  


My favorite reality contest show was Biggest Loser.  Not only was the goal to lose weight but the show counseled participants on the root of their weight issues.  Many discovered their pain from abuse or loss triggered their unhealthy eating habits.  Without resolution of that pain, they were sure to continue on their destructive, “easier” paths.  

Friend, if in your own life you seek bandaids rather than true healing, if you try to avoid doing things the right way because it just seems easier, God is calling you to wisdom.  Stolen water is sweet but the dead live in that realm.  He is calling you to life and true joy.

Father, at times it seems simpler and less painful to take the easy path.  Please guide me to making better choices that effect both my own life and the world around me.  Amen

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Patience In The Waiting

Blessed are those who listen to me, watching daily at my doors, waiting at my doorway. Proverbs 8:34

Have you ever met one of those people that seem to calmly wait in long lines?  Like they’ve got nothing better to do?  That attitude has always seemed strange and foreign to me.  I mean, I’ve got stuff to accomplish. People to see, errands to run!  Patience has definitely not been one of my well-honed attributes.  But if I learned anything during the Covid years it was to slow down, way down.  In fact, when everything started opening up I could feel my body reacting to getting back in the busy flow of life, speeding up to meet the traffic.  The Holy Spirit whispered to me again to slow down, to wait, to watch and to listen.

While the verse today specifically speaks to waiting for wisdom and insight, I think we can all agree that patience really is a virtue in every aspect of our lives.  Oh, how many times in my baby Christian days did I jump into situations without first asking a few questions or even praying about them!  Those were the days of making decisions first then asking God afterwards to make those decisions work out for the best.

As I’ve worked on developing a more patient frame of mind it’s caused me to evaluate why I am impatient.  I mean think about it.  As you’re tapping your foot in line at the coffee shop what are you really contemplating?  Your time is so much more valuable than anyone else’s?  If you were in charge, things would be running a lot smoother?  The cashier obviously isn’t smart enough or cares enough about his job?  The root of all these is pride, lack of grace and humility.

Or maybe you tend to jump at opportunities like a new job, an investment, a free giveaway or a deal on a purchase.  If you don’t act now you might just miss out!  Is it that you’ve placed money as an idol, either saving it or spending it?  Or status and recognition before wise choices?

Friend, unless you are faced with an immediate life or death decision, wisdom asks us just for a few moments of time.  A chance to gain insight into the choice or attitude you are about to take.  So let’s all take a collective breath say a prayer.

Lord, I get so caught up in the daily comings and goings of my life and need your help to slow down and be patient.  Remind me today to give grace to those who need it and seek insight for my decisions.  Amen

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Pursue Wisdom & Insight

Say to wisdom, “You are my sister,”
    and to insight, “You are my relative.” Proverbs 7:4

The word “wisdom” can be found about 200 times throughout the Bible.  Proverbs, Job and Ecclesiastes are the frequent “go to” wisdom books for any Christian.  Proverbs teaches us how to treat people, the fear of the Lord, how to manage finances, how to behave in marriage, about laziness and greed, the importance of our words and so much more.  Yet how often, when we are seeking advice on our real world problems do you say, “let me look that up in Proverbs”?  

Is it because we think eh, it’s old world thinking?  Or maybe we just haven’t considered the Bible as a reference book for teaching and correcting.  We seek out a friend, look it up online, ask a counselor, read a self-help book, go to a seminar.  I would venture to say every single modern quandary has its answer in one of the wisdom books or even in Jesus’ own words.

The beauty of any type of proverb, which can be found throughout history in every culture, is that they are short, concise reminders of the way things are or even what happens when we go astray.  Like that favorite praise song that always seems to be on your lips, a few good biblical proverbs memorized can be constant reminders of say, when to keep our tongues silent or our wallets secured. 

God’s proverbs are never in conflict and can be trusted guides.  Read and memorized they are that gentle reminder by our sister in Christ.  I challenge you to take a sin with which you struggle and find one or two wisdom statements, or proverbs, and memorize them.  Have them in the forefront of your mind guiding you on the path God wants for you.

Friend, the thing about God’s desires for you are this: He, unlike others in our life, has no ulterior motives.  He loves you and wants the best for you.  His advice can be trusted without fail. 

Lord, I trust your advice.  Thank you for giving me a clear path.  Guide my every thought and steps today with your wisdom and insight.  Amen

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A Responsible Servant

Go to the ant, you sluggard;
    consider its ways and be wise!
It has no commander,
    no overseer or ruler,
yet it stores its provisions in summer
    and gathers its food at harvest. Proverbs 6:6-8

Jack Hyles started preaching at several small Texas churches after he graduated from college in the early 50s.  Many of those congregations were small, under 100 members.  During his time at Miller Road Baptist Church that congregation grew from 44 to 4,000 members.  He eventually moved to Indiana where he took over shepherding the First Baptist Church of Hammond.  Membership grew from about 700 to over 20,000.  Along the way Hyles saw the need for better Sunday school programs and eventually, through his innovative Sunday bus program, grew a small Sunday program to one recognized as one of the largest Sunday school programs in America, if not the world.  

“A person who will not take care of the little things will not take care of the big things, for big things are but an accumulation of little things,” he once said.  You see, Mr. Hyles took Proverbs 6:6-8 to heart.  He was responsible, a good steward, of the gifts God imparted him.  He didn’t need an overseer in the church or a show of hands or even a committee to see how to build God’s kingdom here on earth.  He just did it.

I’ve spent many years volunteering in churches and sitting on committees.  It seems an unfortunate fact that many feel they need a blessing by their church to start a ministry.  You not only won’t find that in the Bible but you will find an urging to individually take responsibility for the treasure and talent you have been given.

The ant is part of a collective, yes.  But an ant also knows what its role is within the community.  To build, protect, and sustain. It doesn’t go to any one ant to get its marching orders.  It doesn’t sit around fretting about its greater purpose before acting.  It doesn’t fill out an interest survey to find out its “best suited place.” No, it just gets working.  

Friend, we all have been tasked with working for God’s church.  To build it, to protect it and to sustain it.  Don’t wait for the perfect time or opportunity.  He asks us to take care of the little things first.  You may find in washing a few dishes or folding programs that God has placed you right where you need to be.

Father God, use me as you see fit.  No matter where I am placed, I will work for your Kingdom.  Help me to be a good steward of your gifts imparted to me.  Amen

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Peace-Creating Discipline

For lack of discipline they will die, led astray by their own great folly. Proverbs 5:23

Charles Spurgeon, one of the most prolific pastors of all time said just a few weeks before his death, “I look back, and remember what I might have done and have not done; what opportunities of usefulness I have not seized; what sins I have allowed to pass unrebuked; what struggling beginners in grace I have failed to help.”  A man who had spoken to millions.  Who brought the good news of Jesus’ healing lights to so many, this man in all humility felt he could have done more.  

How many of us can say we have used our time as wisely for the Lord?  How many of us have instead placed so many other activities ahead of helping others out of their darkness?  Of allowing the Holy Spirit to help us out of our own darkness?

When we hear the words “Christian discipline” it may cause us to cringe or to worry about what will be required of us or what we will have to give up.  It sounds harsh and monk-like.  Our thoughts on it may be borrowed from what the world may think of Christians – joyless, rule followers.  However, we are told throughout Proverbs that God’s idea of discipline is actually a lifesaver, peace creator, and joy maker.  

Because God loves all of us – believer and non – He yearns for us to live on the disciplined path.  One that seeks to keep us from the darkness of sexual immorality, greed, self-importance, violence, and more.  

Christian discipline includes these aspects: spiritual, social, physical and mental.  Each, when practiced close in hand with Jesus, is intended to live the full, beautiful, peaceful and joy-filled life God wants for us.  When we stay in His Word and prayer, when we are careful and loving with our relationships with others, when we are good stewards of our bodies, and when we keep our thoughts free of lust, greed and self, we will find our paths simpler.  Our decisions about life get easier.  That’s not to say we won’t encounter push back from the world or even trials.  But in the midst of all that life will throw at us, our Christian discipline will keep the path forward clear.  

Heavenly Father, help me to develop a disciplined life that aligns with your Word so that I may become more like Jesus and experience the life you intend for me.  Amen

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Guard Your Heart

Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it. Proverbs 4:23

I’ll admit to you right here for the world to read that I have a serious problem with cursing.  Once upon a time I was innocent with my expletives.  I’d say, “Jimminy Crickets!” and “gosh darn.”  And then I started working in a restaurant.  By the time I’d graduated high school my responses to things that went awry or to not nice people weren’t so innocent any more.  Up until recently I figured I just needed to work harder at stopping.  But I was reminded that overcoming sin requires more than just “working harder.”

I read a devotional that convicted me of the root of my sin – the status of my heart.  It shone a light on what was flowing from my heart — anger, pride, unforgiveness, lack of compassion, lack of self-control.  Although James was spot on with his imagery of the tongue being like a fire, I realized that that fire is sparked by my heart.  

My “ah ha” moment that day was how much anger I allow to swirl around in my head and in my heart when someone doesn’t act how I expect or when the world doesn’t stick to My Plan.  Instead of compassion, kindness, love there’s *@%!   A truly ugly use of my God-given heart and tongue.  And a heart change can only take place with the help of the Holy Spirit.  My gal pals know I’ve joined forces with the Holy Spirit to remind me of the fruits of the spirit whenever I leave my house (because I never seem to have a cussing problem in the quiet confines of my She Shed!).  I cannot produce this fruit; I can only bear it because I am closely attached to the vine of Jesus. 

Friend, the world doesn’t think cussing is any big deal these days.  In the past, you’d never hear cuss words on tv or on the radio.  If you’ve ever spent more than a few minutes at an elementary school – yes, elementary school – you’ll find our lax attitudes toward this sin have affected our children.  But we are called as Christians to be different.  To be transformed.  We are to guard our hearts from taking in and spewing darkness.   I, for one, take the pledge.  How about you?

Holy Spirit, guide my choices today in what I take into my mind and heart and help me to return to the world the fruits of your Spirit – kindness, compassion, patience and most of all love.  Amen