Tag: sex

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The Well-Travelled Soul

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“That the God of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of glory, may give you the Spirit of wisdom and of revelation in the knowledge of him, having the eyes of your hearts enlightened, that you may know what is the hope to which he has called you, what are the riches of his glorious inheritance in the saints, and what is the immeasurable greatness of his power toward us who believe, according to the working of his great might.”  Ephesians 1: 17-19

Have you ever heard someone young described as having an “old soul?”  It usually describes a young person who seems to think and act much older than their actual years.  Or someone who enjoys music, art, crafting, etc. from years past.  I’ll be honest, I cringe when I hear this phrase.  Because usually the person they describe just seems naturally more introverted.  Not shy, just one who enjoys quiet.  Quiet time and quiet activities.

In reality, all Christians must travel the highway of sanctification to attain true and deep wisdom.  We gather it along the road in our baskets little by little with each trial and tribulation and heartbreak.  Each time we act in God’s will, not the way of the world, we find another fruit in that basket.  When we get to the end of our sanctification road, our dents, scratches, repairs and maybe even a little duct tape, will be our trophies of gathered wisdom. 

I bring the “old soul” view up because it flies in the face of what the sanctification road means for a Christian.  Worldly wisdom can only get us so far on this journey.  We, however, seek the wisdom gifted by Christ Jesus.  The wisdom that comes from the different steps we have discussed thus far: knowledge of our LORD, submission to the LORD, the experiences of trials, and the stewardship of all He has given us.

King Solomon wrote in Ecclesiastes 7:3-4, “Sorrow is better than laughter, for by sadness of face the heart is made glad.  The heart of the wise is in the house of mourning, but the heart of fools is in the house of mirth.“

In other words, we learn a lot more about life, ourselves, others, and God when we face sadness and hardship.  So that supposed 10 year old “old soul,” if raised in a modern society, has yet to gather much in their basket of life.  

Worldly Wisdom vs. Godly Wisdom

What’s the difference between worldly wisdom and God’s wisdom?  If you study Proverbs, you’ll see the best worldly wisdom has to offer actually comes directly from that book!  The worst is highlighted throughout the Bible with names such as greed, lust, selfishness, pride, and vengeance.  Worldly wisdom so often focuses on the “me” and not the “thee.”

The world tells us it is wise to go along with our loved ones’ sins.  “Go along to get along.”  “Don’t judge.”  God’s Word flies in the face of this when He tells us: “My dear friends, if you know people who have wandered off from God’s truth, don’t write them off. Go after them. Get them back and you will have rescued precious lives from destruction and prevented an epidemic of wandering away from God.” (James 5:19-20 the Message)

We are likewise reminded when we share the freedom message of Christ Jesus it may separate us from those same friends and family—a worldly unwise move.  In light of this, we hold on to the truth that this is yet another act of submitting; which brings us closer to God’s wise plan for our lives.

The world tells you it’s wise to have sex outside marriage.  Why?  Apparently so you know more about sex and can pick a good sex partner in marriage.  And besides they say, it’s your “right” to have a little fun.  The Bible tells us “There’s more to sex than mere skin on skin. Sex is as much spiritual mystery as physical fact. As written in Scripture, “The two become one.” Since we want to become spiritually one with the Master, we must not pursue the kind of sex that avoids commitment and intimacy, leaving us lonelier than ever—the kind of sex that can never “become one.” (1 Cor 16:19-20 the Message)  The promoters of sexually immoral behavior call abstinence before marriage unwise.  Yet God’s wisdom tells us to value this gift as precious.

My friends, besides standing with Jesus at the end of my life, my end-goal on this journey is wisdom.  When to keep my mouth shut and when to speak.  When to help others and when to be wary of fools.  Recognizing good character and keeping far afield of pigs who want to steal my pearls.  Remaining calm when the world says to panic.  A knowing that forgiving those the world says I should hate actually heals my own soul.

This week’s question: What’s something you have become wiser about in your journey of life?

Next week we’ll take one last look at our sanctification journey as we wisely travel the road home.

For more study on wisdom check out these series: “31 Days of God’s Wisdom” and “Enjoy Life: From Meaningless to Meaningful (a study of Ecclesiastes)

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Not Our Own

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"Don’t you know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit who is in you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought at a price. So glorify God with your body." 1 Corinthians 6:19-20

If you live in the United States you know all about the importance of Fall and Winter Sundays. Sure we go to church and worship and praise the Lord. But today so many Americans also attend a second service. It’s held in giant stadiums or enjoyed from the comfort of our homes or restaurants. Yes, my friends, fall Sundays are, for so many, a chance to scream and yell and whoop it up over American football. Their favorite teams and players take to the gridiron in a clashing of bodies for the ultimate victory — helping a small, brown, weirdly shaped ball find its way to what is called the end zone. It’s a physical game played by tough men. It’s a game where season ending injuries are a regular occurrence and minor mistakes can lead to embarrassing failures.

The fans, like so many sports fans, can be adoring when you are very good. And they can be terrifyingly brutal when you aren’t playing your best. If you are not tethered to something else more important than the game you can be in danger of losing your very self.

“When you have a ‘why,’ you can endure everything and I think when your faith is strong, when you understand what’s going on in your life… you just turn to God and surrender. For me, that was the biggest weight off my back was that word — surrender. You’re not in control as much as you think you are and that’s a gift.”

Christian McCaffrey, running back for the San Francisco 49ers football team

McCaffrey is just one of many professional athletes who, when they stand in front of a microphone with hoards of media types staring at them, they give all honor and glory to God. Not just for their physical success but for their failures. While most of us will never be professional athletes we all can find ways we place our body’s successes and failures too high in importance in our lives. “I’m too fat, I’m too weak, I’m not tall enough” are some of the ways we beat ourselves to death. Then there’s the need to make ourselves sexy or brawny or literally into someone else via plastic surgery.

“For good or for evil, the body lies right at the center of the spiritual life….It is a fact that the body usually hinders people in doing what they know to be good and right.”

Dallas Willard in his bestselling Christian book, Renovation of the Heart.

The use of our bodies becomes not just a physical thing but as it matures it increasingly takes on the quality of our inner life. Paul, himself in Romans 7 says he finds himself doing things he “hates.” 

"So now I am no longer the one doing it, but it is sin living in me. For I know that nothing good lives in me, that is, in my flesh. For the desire to do what is good is with me, but there is no ability to do it. For I do not do the good that I want to do, but I practice the evil that I do not want to do." Romans 7:17-19

You see he makes a point to say, “in my flesh.” That’s his body, our bodies. We use our bodies to achieve sensual pleasures beyond God’s desire for us. We use our tongues to destroy others. We even use our facial features and our posture to make it clear how we really feel about a situation. Some of us physically lash out in anger. While others find ways to manipulate with tears or a quivering lip. An increasing number of young people believe if their body doesn’t make them feel complete then something must be wrong with it — causing them to undergo painful, life altering surgeries.

"Therefore, brothers and sisters, in view of the mercies of God, I urge you to present your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God; this is your true worship. Do not be conformed to this age, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so that you may discern what is the good, pleasing, and perfect will of God." Romans 12:1-2

My friends, while we have been led to believe that “my body, myself” is the truth by society it couldn’t be farther from it. It’s why there’s such a great divide in the abortion issue. One side says, “It’s my body to do with it how I please. Having sex outside marriage is pleasing to me. Suffering the consequences, is not.” Whereas, Christians must see our bodies as that living sacrifice — giving all honor and glory to God. As Willard reminds us, none of us have created our own bodies. None of us could care for our bodies for many years. And no matter how much we want to believe it, our bodies are not self-sufficient still.

We are stewards of our bodies. But that doesn’t mean we alone have the right to say what is to be done with them. We don’t own our bodies, God does. Every single body, believer or not. He decided the day and time our entrance to the world. And He alone will decide our exit from this earth. He created our bodies for His plan, not ours.

So, whether we are professional athletes playing a sport, or we wake up each morning for work, or play, in times of illness or strength, we must seek to glorify Him by surrendering our bodies to Him wholly in worship. When we succeed in our physical tasks, say out loud that it is all for His glory. When we seemingly fail, say out loud that you trust in Him, trust His plan. And remember, you are living this life for an audience of One.

Here’s a few tips from Dallas Willard on the spiritual formation of our bodies:

  1. You must actually release your body to God. It won’t happen by accident. Be intentional remembering it is scriptural teaching.
  2. Take a day in silent and solitary retreat. Quiet your mind and soul.
  3. Ask God to take charge of your body. Pray on each actual part of your body.
  4. No longer idolize your body. You care for it only as it serves God’s purposes in your life and the lives of others.
  5. Do not misuse your body. Bodily pleasure is one thing but when it is exalted to a necessity and we become dependent upon it, then we are slaves.
  6. The body is to be properly honored and cared for. Honor a sabbath by practicing solitude and silence. Get plenty of sleep.

May all honor and glory be to God alone. Amen

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God Is Love

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Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. 5 It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs. 6 Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. 7 It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I don’t think I’d be too off the mark in surmising that so much of human bad behavior stems from a need to be loved.  We seek fame and fortune to be noticed, to be loved.  We have affairs to feel needed and loved.  We engage in all sorts of sexual immorality in seeking love’s bliss.  We get petty and petulant because we feel slighted or unloved.  We gossip to draw others into our inner circle to feel important and adored.  When we feel lacking in being loved or even loving ourselves the doors open for the devil to whisper his sweet nothings to us.

It’s love we so desperately seek in so many wrong ways from the wrong sources.

Praise God that He first, created love.  How could He not?  The earth, sun, oceans, and garden were a thing of overwhelming beauty created for man to enjoy.  A gift like that can only be made out of love.  God is Himself love.  He gives Himself freely to us, even when we reject Him.  He waits patiently in this time of grace, for us to turn our eyes to Him.

There’s no magic formula or check to write for this true love.  Even when we are acting out in our most sinful ways, He gives us yet another opportunity to let Him love us.  Yes, let Him love us.  Too many of us push God away – possibly out of shame or guilt or a feeling of worthlessness.  I, myself, have stood harshly judging my reflection.  I have struggled accepting God’s love.  My past can sit like a demon shadow in front of me, pulling me into darkness.  But more often lately I’m looking at the face in the mirror asking God to help me love myself as much as I know He loves me.

Keep your lives free from the love of money and be content with what you have, because God has said, “Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.” Hebrews 13:5

My greatest hope for my daughters is that they won’t take as long as I have to look in the mirror and know how well they are loved by God.  He will never leave them.  He won’t gossip about them or betray them.  He won’t judge them harshly.  He will love their fresh, young faces the same as He will love their old and wrinkly ones.

Love is an emotion that has drawn thousands of poets and scribes to try and describe.  It’s not a simple thing.  It seems bigger than all the other feelings we have at our human disposal.  It’s complicated and beautiful.  Just like God. 

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The Unexpected Warrior

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When his family heard about this, they went to take charge of him, for they said, “He is out of his mind.” Matthew 3:21

During my senior year of high school, I decided to try and live out my dream of becoming an astronaut.  I met with an Air Force recruiter and was excited to take off on this new adventure.  And then I told my parents.  It was my father that said to me, “You are a lot like your mom and your mom couldn’t handle the military. She dropped out after about a week.  You two don’t like to be told what to do.  So, it’d be best to drop this idea.”

From the outside I exuded confidence.  But on the inside, I was terrified about what people thought about me. I always obeyed my parents out of fear of the repercussions.  And so, I gave up my dream.  I assumed everything my father said was correct.

Imagine if Jesus had so little courage.

His own family thought him a little wacky.  I mean if you announced to your family that you were the Messiah…. But unlike me, He knew where His identity resided – in God.  

So often when we think about courage and courageous people we think of military and political warriors.  And while we can be eternally grateful for people that go off to war to fight for our freedoms and people like Martin Luther King who make big waves in Washington DC, if we stop there we might be inclined to not step up to the plate when it’s our turn.

Jesus wasn’t a military warrior.  He didn’t fight to change laws.  He didn’t work hard to get elected to lead a nation.  But what He did do, from the first day He declared Himself the Messiah, was choose to lay aside any and all standing with man to serve God.  He knew from that day it would be soon to die on the cross.

“His was the courage of the mind, the heroism of the heart.  It was a sober and reasoned thing.  He deliberately counted the cost and paid it.”

Charles Jefferson, The Character of Jesus

In other words, He knew without a doubt who He served and who had His back. Every single decision He made, the words He spoke were for the glory of God.  He knew people would hate him.  He knew people would misunderstand Him.  And He knew He still needed to speak.

In my BSGs study on Revelation we recently looked at chapter 11 in which two witnesses are assigned by God to give some final admonishment to the people.  A final plea to turn to God.  Throughout their 3 years on earth the world attempts to destroy these witnesses through any means possible – they are true “warriors for God.”  And until God said it was time to go, they were protected.  We were asked that week who are powerful witnesses in our present generation?  Who would you name?

Although I don’t know him personally, I do believe one such powerful witness is of the famed Duck Dynasty clan, Phil Robertson.  This rough looking, old man has been much maligned by our media and culture.  But to hear his salvation story can only show God’s grace, mercy and forgiveness. 

You see, Mr. Robertson was a child of the 60s.  When he went off to college in 1964, he had a wife and child at home.  The message proliferated at college was of the “sex, drugs and rock n roll” variety.  No rules, no obligations.  He took to that message like a duck to water and was frequently drunk, doing drugs, and cheating on his wife.  When he graduated and got a job this lifestyle continued.  He also felt his family was holding him down.  And so, they left him one day.  For two weeks he partied until the cows came home.  Then he realized he was miserable.  He had not only lost his job as a teacher but also a bar he owned.

He begged his wife to take him back.  She would, if he cleaned up his act.  God softened his heart and Mr. Robertson sought out a Christian mentor.  With the strength of God behind him he pulled himself from his old life and began a one reborn.  

“And so, I devoted my waking hours to studying the Bible.  I pored over the onion-skin pages and began to mark them up.  I consumed the Word of God as if it were food and drank deeply from its waters of wisdom.”

Phil Robertson, The Theft of America’s Soul

When I read this, what came to mind were the Navy SEALs that train not far from my house.  To be a SEAL, an elite member of the US military, you need to eat, sleep and devote every waking minute to training.  Their goal is to be the best soldier possible.  But what about us average Christians?  What is our goal?  Will we be like Phil Robertson and wholly commit ourselves to the cause of God?

Fast forward in Mr. Robinson’s life and we land in the middle of the show Duck Dynasty.  It was a reality show following around his family – a family of backwoods hunters and fishermen from Louisiana who own a duck call business.   During this show the family became warriors for God.  While their producers would almost demand they do or say things outside the morals of their faith, they would stand strong.  They were willing to lose all the money offered them.  They prayed and spoke of their faith throughout the show.  And they garnered millions of fans.  And enemies.  They were called backward, stupid, far-right crazy, mostly because of their commitment to their faith.  

“It’s been 43 years since my encounter with God and I can tell you, I’m not running from anyone or anything; I’m not enslaved to the ‘isms’ of the world.”

Phil Robertson, The Theft of America’s Soul

We can make excuses for why we won’t stand our ground and stand up for God – I might lose my job, I might lose my friends/family, I might be called any manner of names.  Doesn’t that all come from a fear of man rather than a trust in God?  Phil Robertson wasn’t famous and then got a TV show.  He was a man making duck calls who became famous for being funny, principled, a family leader, and God-fearing.  

Many of us probably aren’t ready to be a full time warrior for God.  We must practice the first two steps so they become a natural part of us.  When we can naturally say a prayer for those who would hurt us, when we anticipate and readily step forward to fill a need that Jesus places before us, only then are we certainly more prepared for this step.

I follow a Christian pastor on Instagram.  He has a series of YouTube talks where he delves into our culture’s most pressing topics.  After reading how he lovingly and with wisdom responds to some of the vitriol he receives I realized, I’m not quite ready yet for the bigger battlefield.  I need to chew and gnaw some more on God’s Word.  God has been testing me along the way with mini quizzes.  Small opportunities to stand for Him.  My training to be a Warrior for God continues.