illness

Jesus performed many other signs in the presence of his disciples, which are not recorded in this book. ³¹But these are written that you may believethat Jesus is the Messiah, the Son of God, and that by believing you may have life in his name.  John 20 30-31

This is what the Lord says: “When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will come to you and fulfill my good promise to bring you back to this place. ¹¹For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:10-11

Yesterday, I shared about my illness and the brief but wonderous healing I experienced. I’ll be honest, when I started feeling all the same symptoms come back, I prayed like David so often did in the Psalms asking, “Why?” I didn’t and still don’t fully understand why He allowed me to feel so good for a time. Don’t get me wrong, I definitely appreciated it. But let’s be honest, we humans so easily can feel like God is punishing us when we go through trials.

Then I turned to the truth. The truth that God loves us and it pains Him to see us suffer the trials of this world. I also know it’s through those trials we can choose to hold on tighter to Him or turn away.

I look at this decision this way – to where would I turn? Worldly addictions that only make life worse? Or to a God who performs miracles? I prefer to stand in faith that my season of healing may be around the corner. If not soon, then I know it will be true one day.

My friend, the Lord has plans for you. Most likely you will have to cross a few alligator infested waters in faith. Those trials will be your testimony to give others hope. In fact, just the other day a friend of mine woke up with her shoulder mysteriously in so much pain she could barely bear it. After a trip to urgent care and pain medication, she was able to make it through the weekend. She said to me a few days later, “I thought of you. I don’t know how you have gotten through what you’ve been through for so long.” I smiled and said, “It’s all the Lord.” Nothing is impossible for Him.

Click here to listen to today’s song: Stand In Faith

And he said to her, “Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease.”  Mark 5: 34

In my distress I called upon the Lord;
    to my God I cried for help.
From his temple he heard my voice,
    and my cry to him reached his ears. Psalm 18:6

My youngest daughter sent this beautiful song to me a little while back when I was having a particularly bad bout of the mysterious illness I’ve been suffering the last three years. My head felt as though it was being squeezed in a vise with needles being jammed in my ears. I could barely hear. And in just a few days we were to celebrate the birth of Jesus. I wanted more than anything to fully enjoy all the activities planned with my visiting family. Yet, I barely had the strength to get out of bed each day. I was exhausted from battling through the pain.

I wanted a miracle just as the bleeding woman received from Jesus. Healed of my disease to go about my life in peace. This song was Jesus’ vehicle to remind me that He is my strength when I am weak. He and He alone helped me push through the pain and be able to see the beauty of my life all around me. To see my daughters jump in and take care of anything needed. To feeling the joy of holding my baby granddaughter and the loving embrace of my grandson.

One week after Christmas every single one of my symptoms disappeared. My doctors have yet to determine why for a month and a half I lived completely free of pain. My hearing was restored. It was glorious. It was a beautiful gift.

While many of my symptoms eventually returned, those six weeks provided me with hope that there is a solution. That my hearing isn’t permanently damaged.

I’ve learned so much about suffering these past three years and what relying on the Lord really means. My symptoms may never permanently disappear but I know in my cries for help He hears my voice. I will keep crying out for Him to hold me in His arms. And I know everything is going to be all right.

Click here to listen to today’s song: Gonna Be Alright

Tag: illness

Day 19 Stand In Faith

Day 18 Gonna Be Alright